Slot Machines in Shopping Malls

Just hear me out on this one.

I’ve gone into detail about the ravaging of Atlantic City, and solely blamed the city itself for the problems it sees itself in currently. (see previous post: The Atlantic City Problem) However it isn’t the city alone that is hurting. The gaming parent companies that own casinos down there (Caesars, Trump, Boyd… well maybe not Boyd, the Borgata’s doing quite well for itself) are having difficulties keeping their heads above water. Insert ocean pun here. 

Caesars Entertainment shut down the Showboat purely because it didn’t feel like maintaining a fourth AC property, preferring to funnel that money into Caesars, Bally’s and Harrah’s. Trump Entertainment Resorts... well we all know how horribly they’ve kept up with the Plaza and Taj Mahal, practically using their time-warped interiors as the selling point. Now that the Plaza is gone and Taj is pulling a Revel (“Oh, we *might* be closing soon,” when the writing is on the wall), the only thing that can save Trump ER is Donald Trump himself, and he might just do so.

And let’s touch upon the Ghosts of AC Past. Playboy/Atlantis flat out went bankrupt in the 80s. Hilton pulled out of gaming completely, selling its interest in the Atlantic City Hilton and the Las Vegas Hilton (consequently renaming each as ACH and LVH). ACH was later reborn as the Atlantic Club, the first AC casino catering to locals. An interesting premise that could have worked out, but simply put, it didn’t. They were the first to close this year, back in January. Sands pulled out of AC years ago, closed and imploded its casino, and sold the land to Pinnacle Entertainment which was to build an all-new megaresort on the site. They never did. And poor Revel Entertainment… they really tried. They made glaring mistakes all the way through, but still pressed on with a smile. But smiles don’t pay the bills.

The rest of the pics in this post are actual times when luck smiled on me. Even if it really wasn't much.

So as one could imagine, gaming corporations can run into financial problems easily. For Atlantic City properties, they run into those problems very easily. So how can they build back a little bank? It’s simple: take more gamblers’ money. Increase that house edge. And really hope some guy doesn’t hit the progressive jackpot. As today’s gaming climate shows, casinos are no longer the kind of venue you’ll only find in two or three cities in the whole country. They are everywhere now. Racinos, Indian reservations, riverboats, cruise ships, and the Internet are just a few places country-wide you could play a legal game of chance. Atlantic City can still be a gaming hub, along with Las Vegas, Reno, Detroit and lately Philadelphia. However there is no denying that casino atmospheres do and continue to exist between these cities. 

For our friends up in corporate to survive, we'll need to start seeing casino-like amenities as ubiquitous as retail stores and restaurants, starting with AC's home state (and shopping mall central), New Jersey. “Oh that new mall?” people in the year 2030 will say, “Yeah it’s great! It’s got an Armani Exchange, an IMAX theater, a Cheesecake Factory, and a Caesars Lite.” Or they will say, “Did you hear they’re going to put a Tropicana Express in Bridgewater Commons? Yeah, it’s taking the place of that old Radio Shack.” These would be slot parlors, no more than 50 machines to a location, offering slots, video poker, and perhaps virtual table games. By no means will these places be large, as keeping them small would be the key to success. Those old Sears and Fortunoff anchor buildings will have to find another use.

Owned by the gaming parent companies themselves, they would mostly blend in with other storefronts, much like mall arcades did in the 80s. Nothing super flashy or excessive, and not bleeding out into the mall proper, just a tastefully designed room with a smattering of games inside. Well lit, with clocks, and noise kept in check. No comps, no cocktails, and no super jackpots. But they would have extensive advertising for the parent company’s closest casinos, perhaps even incentives (slot play, free buffet) for those specific properties. These would not be casinos in the traditional sense. They would be merely a place to kill time and have a little fun, akin to a lounge. Bets would be kept minimum, no high rolling and no way to lose your life savings on a single hand.

Suppose the wife is trying on a million pairs of shoes and you couldn’t care less to watch. Don’t go to the Cinnabon and gorge yourself, spend that $5 on a few virtual blackjack hands, a dollar a hand. “Honey I’ll be over in Caesars Lite.” “Okay, meet you there soon!” See how natural that sounds? You were going to spend $5 anyway, why not use it to flex your brain (because blackjack does involve strategy) and possibly win enough money for lunch? And if you don’t, big deal. It’s just lunch.

Credits. Not dollars. Quarters. Oh well.

So how in the heck would these not-casinos make any money? With minimum bets, no familiar trappings and an overall lack of draw, it sounds like I’m shooting these places in the foot. But look at it this way: small storefronts minimize rent. Complete automation (no physical dealers) requires few employees. Being in concentrated population centers will guarantee that the parlors won’t go unnoticed, even by being discreet. And do you know how many millions casinos take in, even when they’re performing poorly? Gambling naturally rakes in a ton of money, so even if these parlors take in only tens of thousands, it will still be more than enough to cover the overhead. There will always be someone playing, that is a natural certainty.

Overall with these places, less will be more. Think of these slot lounges as demos for the major casinos. With their decor, you get a taste of the ‘real’ Golden Nugget, the ’real’ Harrah's. Authentic games but slightly limited in how much you can play. They would be ideal for nervous newcomers to practice and learn. The brochures and promos would entice people who are enjoying themselves to enjoy themselves even more at one of the actual resorts, drawing them to (in this case) Atlantic City. That’s where the casino companies will make their money, in their flagships. The offsite slot parlors would act essentially as a giant PR liaison.

Like video game demos for example, some people are more than content to just replay the same one level over and over again, never actually buying the game. Likewise, some players will be just fine playing in Mini Bally’s, never actually visiting Bally’s proper. And that’s fine! The customer is happy and Caesars Entertainment still gets a little revenue out of it, from a person that they otherwise never would have. It’s a win-win.

“But these places will defile otherwise wholesome family venues!” the naysayers will say. “Gambling will bring hookers and bums to the mall, and innocent shoppers will squander their money. The children will be corrupted by the mere sight of these parlors, and people will turn violent as they lose more and more! Mainstream gambling will be the dearth of society!” Cool your jets and let me counter:

Casinos do have a reputation of introducing seediness. Ok fine. Giant buildings designed for vice can have that side-effect. But a dozen or so slot machines in a former Foot Locker? Do you really think a row of Double Diamond Deluxes (fixed at a quarter) is going to bring in the wackos off the street? With prostitutes turning tricks behind the bill breakers? Come on. Second, the mall patrons were going to squander their money on overpriced items anyway. Third, by introducing (in a way) casino games to children, it will desensitize them once they get old enough to play. Or it will interest them, and by being exposed to it, they will play responsibly due to the lack of novelty. (You will still need to be 21+ to play, and with ID swiping and in-slot webcams, the rules can still be enforced.) Gambling is no worse than the alcohol they constantly see at family parties, restaurants and on TV commercials. It’s just another adult activity. Finally, if someone goes ape and starts shooting people because they lost a game, I don’t think the slot parlor is to blame.

Five minutes of unadulterated spins would've netted me $165.26 if they actually counted.

It would also help to put these slot lounges in more affluent areas. For some reason, casino companies love to put their resorts in impoverished, washed out areas. Detroit, Atlantic City, now Queens, the Mississippi River... And they wonder why undesirable people keep hanging around, gee what a mystery. Why not put these gambling halls in rich areas? I never understood that. Put a Caesars Lite in The Mall at Short Hills, where a mere T-shirt will set you back $100. Put one in Garden State Plaza, the Forrestal Village, places that should charge a cover fee just for entering. Casino companies keep advertising rich-looking people, and offer over-the-top luxury to those that qualify. Yet they cater to the lowest common denominator. If the beautiful people with disposable income are your target audience, go to them! 

There will also be a little thing known as legality that will have to be played nice with... But with the recent legitimizing of sports betting, online gaming, and just Atlantic City's casino existence in the first place, the first stones have already been cast. The city and the state are running out of options fast, and it's time for fantastical ideas like this one to be looked at. They want to put casinos in the Meadowlands and Jersey City, great let's just build even more billion-dollar infrastructure that will make everything much more complicated. Instead they could just shell out a couple hundred thousand and put Micro-Borgata in Short Hills, promoting Atlantic City as the 'full version.'

Mainstream gambling will be the savior for the gaming companies and the overall industry. Use alcohol as an example: drinks are everywhere. It’s an exclusively adult activity, and many adults enjoy it responsibly. Yes there are some that have to buck that trend, but they don’t ruin it for everyone else. And alcohol is expensive. People will spend $1000 on a bottle of wine and be praised for it. However, if they bet $1000 on roulette they are considered a fool, even if they win. Gambling is constantly picked on because it can only be done in certain places, and this exclusivity fosters other problems that surround it. But if casino games were as commonplace and accepted as alcohol, would everyone be so quick to shame? Heck, we already have vending machines for lottery tickets set up in supermarkets! Do we see people lining up to feed these machines their paychecks, with beggars and prostitutes loitering outside ShopRite? Of course not!! These machines get menial attention and still rake in serious dough for the state. Somehow the lottery is embraced by society ("Did you get your Powerball ticket yet? The jackpot just hit $500 million!"), and slots are ridiculed ("Aah the odds are terrible. You'll never win!") 

Education plays a big factor here also, as the worst gambling offenders are the ones that know neither what they’re doing, nor the magnitude of their decisions. It’s those that understand the games and the house edge that are able to enjoy them, promoting the responsible use of this kind of entertainment. Current and future generations continue to show a declining lack of interest in gaming, and this is partially because of the inconveniences that surround it. Yet it’s still accepted to spend hundreds on beer and get smashed at college parties, sometimes resulting in a criminal record. Video poker in the mall sounds like a much safer and intellectual alternative now, doesn’t it? And when they go to AC to play with the big boys, at least it'll feel worth it.

The quintessential five BARs. Didn't pay out much but such a perfect lineup is very rare.

Vice is vice, people. It will always be there, because people enjoy it. To support one vice and deride another is silly, especially when the ones that are embraced are deadlier. It isn’t a matter of eliminating the devil (because you can’t), but rather synchronizing with it. Mainstream gambling must be condoned by the public and by politics in order for the industry to succeed. The USA is losing to Macau fast. When the gaming companies thrive, the economies that rely on them (like Atlantic City's) thrive as well. If the whole notion bothers you, then honestly, too bad. Do you want a world without gambling? Move to the moon. You won’t have alcohol, tobacco and casual sexuality there either. And no, your church can't hold bingo or basket auctions to make ends meet. Have fun.